Day 769/141

Since Benjamin’s diagnosis, we have asked for guidance to make decisions for his highest good. Today we were guided in a direction we did not expect, but one that could not have been more clear. We are staying on the seventh floor. Last night, Benjamin had a high fever and rapid pulse, and he was… Continue Reading Day 769/141

Day 768/140

“Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh Benjamin had such a beautiful window of clarity before we went to sleep last night that Michael and I decided in whispers to approach… Continue Reading Day 768/140

Day 767/139

Benjamin continues to do his brave work, and we continue to make the best decisions we can for him. This has always been true, of course, but we are accustomed to being informed by evidence. Now we are being informed by instinct and love alone. I was woken in the middle of the night when… Continue Reading Day 767/139

Day 766/138

The sky at shift change was a thick, foggy red. This is is a strange and confusing time. I am trying to accept all phases of this slow and peaceful transition, but it is so hard to swallow. We all slept in as late as we could this morning. We woke up needing a quiet… Continue Reading Day 766/138

Day 740/112

High highs and low lows today. Sunrises and sunsets. The comforts of home and the realities of leukemia. For the first time in far too long, my day began on the Ringling Bridge with my dear friend. It felt so good to walk with her again, to watch the sky turn orange over the bay, to… Continue Reading Day 740/112

Day 739/111

Benji is sleeping next to me. He is pleasantly exhausted from a long, busy day that went very well. Benji was a little nervous this morning and his tummy hurt. He didn’t want any breakfast. We gave him some Kytril just before we put the numbing cream on his chest. We all took Banyan to… Continue Reading Day 739/111