Day 710/82

It appears as though yesterday’s platelet count was a fluke. Today, the number was back down to 2,000. All day yesterday I tried to shush the voice in my head that told me this was probably the case–how could Benjamin’s platelets be 19,000 when he scratches and petichiae immediately follow?–but I wanted to believe it… Continue Reading Day 710/82

Day 709/81

Benji needed more morphine and heat packs throughout the night to stay comfortable, but these tools worked, and he slept well. He woke up in pain and wanted a hot bath just before shift change. It was so early that his lab work wasn’t back yet. We went back to sleep at sunrise, and when… Continue Reading Day 709/81

Day 708/80

There were a lot of positive things about today that I’d like to focus on. Right now I’m finding it difficult. I’m grateful for this space in which to sort it out. Benjamin is sleeping soundly now, but only after experiencing intense pain in his spleen tonight that required morphine. It hasn’t caused him this… Continue Reading Day 708/80

Day 707/79

Last night was a rough one. Benjamin woke up several times during our short sleep, unable to find comfort. His spleen hurt worse than it has in weeks. At first I wondered if this was a good sign, maybe some proof that his blood is trying to filter dying leukemia cells. Then my optimism turned… Continue Reading Day 707/79