Day 37

Today was almost perfect.

Today, aside from morning and evening antibiotics and a few minor mood swings, there was no mention of leukemia. Leukemia took a silent backseat to much more beautiful things.

Today, I witnessed a brand new baby boy, just minutes old. His gorgeous mother was exhaling out her deepest work, and inhaling brand new love.

Today, my husband packed a picnic and took our boys and their friend to a park. I met them there, and watched as the kids rolled down grassy hills and threw frisbees and fed turtles.

Today, we listened to Benji, and went to the beach to watch the sunset. The boys went swimming in the cold February ocean. We built a sandcastle and climbed on the rocks and chased seagulls.

Today was almost perfect. The almost is because I couldn’t stop the thoughts of what comes Monday from creeping in. I refused to let them linger, but they were there. It’s hard to watch a boy so happy and healthy and know you’re walking into weeks of medicine that could take that feeling away from him (as necessary as we know they are). I have long been a believer in the healing power of saltwater. As I watched Benjamin’s body swimming and splashing and laughing, I found myself wishing the saltwater would just wash away everything else.

When I left my dear friend’s house after the birth of her second child this morning, I was reminded of the intense pride I carried after Benjamin was born. I watched my friend’s daughter falling in love with her new brother, and felt awash with gratitude for Banyan. We have one more day to enjoy this rest between medicines. Then we will walk into Monday, grateful for the healing it will provide.

6 thoughts on “Day 37

  1. Glad you had this wonderful day. I don’t know how they stood that cold water! BRRR!! But I know they had a grand time. Sending prayers, love, and healing thoughts – take it all with you on Monday!

  2. Gorgeous picture and write-up, Laura. Was the friend who had a 2nd child Ryan, by any chance? She wrote me yesterday that she expected a 2nd child.

    I had a wonderful day today, too. My day began with my introducing a speaker at my congregation, the Congregation for Humanistic Judaism. She is head of the Wexler Oral History Project at the Yiddish Book Center in Amherst, MA–and she’s not Jewish. She fell in love with Yiddish when she attended comparative literature classes at Smith–and now that is her passion. She interviewed me for the project yesterday. She was a smashing success today and then we had lunch at the Oneg Shabbat that followed the program.

    I dashed from that to the Asolo Theater where I was a guest of the theater to see “Good People,” which was an excellent play, and then was a panelist for the talk back after the play; part of a three-play talk back program called “Leading Ladies.” Then a friend and I had dinner at Treviso’s. For me, a wonderful day.

    Nancy told me yesterday she had wanted to see that play but was busy planning for postpartum activities.

    I wish you and Benji strength for what lies ahead starting Monday and send you much love,


  3. Will be thinking about you. During bad times in my life the positive thoughts and love I felt from others carried me through. Hopefully my positive thoughts and love will reach you now. Kathy

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